February 2012
17 posts
4 tags
Stricken Costa cruise ship off Seychelles changes... →
from BBC News
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, offer me increasingly discounted cruise packages.
3 tags
Pakistan demolishes bin Laden compound →
from MSNBC
This would have been a lot more impressive if they done it a year earlier.
4 tags
Buffett says stocks, homes are fairly cheap now →
from The Associated Press
I’m pretty sure everything is fairly cheap when you’re Warren Buffett.
6 tags
Neutrinos may still have broken light barrier - or... →
from Reuters
Way to take a stand there, Reuters.
5 tags
Buffett Should ‘Write a Check and Shut Up,’... →
from Businessweek
“Because if he keeps talking about this tax thing it might actually happen.”
3 tags
Dow Pierces 13000 →
from The Wall Street Journal
We’d like to welcome Christian and Tomi to the Markets section, who join us from the Journal’s Knife Review column.
3 tags
NASA Scales Back Mars Exploration Strategy to Fit... →
from Space.com
Some low-budget scenarios NASA officials are considering include a screening of the film “Mission to Mars” and purchasing a copy of The Martian Chronicles for the NASA library.
2 tags
Kodak to Stop Selling Digital Cameras →
from The Wall Street Journal
This article should have been titled “Kodak to Stop Existing.”
5 tags
Here's Everything You Wanted To Know About... →
from San Francisco Gate
Thing #1: They won’t kill the iPad.
5 tags
Gisele Bundchen Backed by Adriana Lima After Super... →
from Fox News Latino
It’s so refreshing to see a supermodel come to the defense of another supermodel.
3 tags
Why it makes sense for Amazon to open its own... →
from GigaOM
Because they ran every brick-and-mortar store that could possibly compete with them out of business?
2 tags
Is Libya Degaddafinated? →
from Tripoli Post
There are numerous studies showing that drinking degaddaf is better for your health.
2 tags
Radcliffe admits being drunk during Potter scenes →
from Reuters
It’s okay; most of us were drunk when we saw it in theaters as well.
4 tags
Mark Zuckerberg Will Have To Pay $1.5 Billion In... →
from San Francisco Chronicle
Wait, that’s the perfect solution for balancing the budget: we just need to have 600 Facebook IPOs every year.
4 tags
Does the Milky Way galaxy have an evil twin? →
from Christian Science Monitor
I don’t know, but if it does can we name it the Snickers galaxy?
3 tags
Does Donald Trump support matter? →
from Fox News
Are you asking if Donald Trump is in favor of physical objects?
Regardless, the answer is no.
5 tags
TSA discovery prompts New York bomb scare - six... →
from CNN
Potential pipe bombs are so six hours ago.
3 tags
Cruise Bookings Fall After Concordia Shipwreck →
from ABC News
This isn’t really “news” so much as it is “completely predictable human behavior.”
January 2012
32 posts
4 tags
RIM's Comeback Plan For Blackberry: Cartoon... →
from Fox News
Sell sell sell.
3 tags
“I have a Kindle that I use to collect dust.”
– Jason Kottke
You could have gotten a paperback to do that for a lot less.
usesthis.com via The Brooks Review
5 tags
Italian cruise ship survivors offered compensation →
from CNN
It better not be a voucher for a free cruise …
5 tags
'Barefoot Bandit' to be sentenced →
from CNN
“Your Honor, my client would like to invoke his ‘no shoes, no serving time’ privilege.”
4 tags
Steven Tyler Botches 'The Star-Spangled Banner':... →
from Fox News
What did you just call The Star-Spangled Banner?
3 tags
Potent proton pulse to BOMBARD EARTH Tuesday morn →
from The Register
But there’s no reason TO PANIC.
5 tags
Did Google Just Break Its Cash Machine? →
from Daily Finance
Did you just say “cash machine?”
3 tags
Why is much of 'Resident Evil' trailer a shill for... →
from CNET
Because … I’m going out on a limb here … Sony paid them to?
5 tags
U.S. rejects Israeli assessment that Iran... →
from Haaretz
Hmm … I wonder who could be behind the assassination of Iran’s nuclear scientists …
3 tags
Iran's nuclear scientists are not being... →
from The Guardian
From Collins English Dictionary: assassinate verb 1. To murder.
4 tags
Irony? SOPA, PIPA supporters blast Internet... →
from CBS News
Irony? What’s that? Hold on, I’ll just look it up on Wikipedia … Nooo!
3 tags
Twitter to Yahoo's Jerry Yang: Don't Let the Door... →
from Forbes
That seems like an awfully rude thing to say to the departing founder of a rival company. What’s that? You mean in the context of this headline the word “Twitter” refers to users of the site, not the company of the same name, while the word “Yahoo” refers to an actual company? That’s messed up.
1 tag
Protest Sapped of Cash →
from Wall Street Journal
I thought lack of cash was what started the protests in the first place.
5 tags
Siege Mentality Grips Wisconsin As Organizers... →
from Fox News
They’re stockpiling food and building defensive fortifications? Over a petition?
2 tags
Romney gives cash to jobless campaign volunteer →
from CBS News
Socialist!
5 tags
In speech at Globes, Peter Dinklage spurs interest... →
from Washington Post
I hate to stoop to pointing out typos, but I believe you meant to say assaulted person.
3 tags
Androids Invade CES 2012 →
from PCWorld
Fortunately the convention center had employed several Blade Runners for just such an eventuality.
4 tags
Obama seeks more power to shrink government →
from CNN.com Blogs
He’s turned into some kind of super villain.
3 tags
A Newt Divided Against Himself Cannot Stand; Obama... →
from Fox News
Fox News just puts random words together; is that it? Suddenly the “Fair & Balanced” motto makes a lot more sense.
3 tags
Google's Schmidt: Android's Rising Tide Benefits... →
from Informationweek
“Well … not RIM, I suppose.”
4 tags
Food giant to gobble up bankrupt Twinkies maker? →
from MarketWatch
Are you telling me there is a giant who eats entire bakeries?
4 tags
TSA defends cupcake confiscation →
CNN via Daring Fireball
“It looked delicious, so we took it.”
P.S. - I’m going to give this one particular incident a pass on my “No More Stupid -Gate Scandal Names” policy, because the incident actually took place on the way to a departure gate.
5 tags
An Uncensored Look at What the Supreme Court Said... →
from Hollywood Reporter
I don’t think anyone is ever required to censor the word “jurisprudence.”
4 tags
Falling jobless rate is good news for Obama →
from Washington Post
Sometimes it’s nice to take a break from reporting the news and simply point out the obvious instead.
4 tags
U.S. Economy Gains Steam as 200,000 Jobs Are Added →
from New York Times
However, some financial analysts question whether these steam-powered jobs will really benefit America in today’s global high-tech economy.
2 tags
Judge to Madoff investors: Tough luck →
from CNNMoney
This headline is paraphrasing, of course. What the judge literally said was “Boo hoo hoo.”
2 tags
Video captures a fish mimicking a mimic octopus... →
from Christian Science Monitor
So … you shot video of a fish acting like a fish?
2 tags
Is Libya Sliding Toward Civil War? →
from Radio Free Europe
Is this headline from last year?
3 tags
Should we design robots to be more like... →
from Christian Science Monitor
Sure, let’s just combine every possible thing that kills humans in movies.
3 tags
Who is the anti-Romney candidate? →
from CBS News
Some guy named Ttim Yenmor? Is it passive aggressive to answer a question with another question?
2 tags
Iran defiant as US unleashes new sanctions →
from Agence France-Presse
I didn’t realize a “sanction” was a type of wild beast that needed to be kept on a leash.
December 2011
115 posts
2 tags
NASA lags behind on disposing aging properties,... →
from Daily Press
Like the moon landing site. When was the last time anyone even visited that?