Headline Hunter

from CNN

“Panic” and “fear” are synonyms.

from Voice of America

Did they not realize that that would be difficult after giving him back to the Chinese? That’s reassuring in a way: the US government isn’t evil, they’re just complete morons.

from Wired

His plan was genius because he knew there was no way police and military personnel would spend hours and hours intensely studying these files.

from Sports Illustrated

So who did they pick so quickly? The suspense is killing me!

from Business Insider

Yes I do, Matt Rosoff. That was you.

Is your argument that you must be right this time because you were wrong before?

from MTV

There is no rest for the Secret Service, who must now interview a rock star right on the heels of their exhaustive, in-depth investigation of Colombian escorts.

from The Washington Post

The president went on to cite “science and stuff like that” as major obstacles to North Korea’s rocket program.

from The Daily Beast

Because it was there.

from CNN

If an arbitrary deadline can’t solve the violence in Syria, I don’t know what possibly can.

from Macworld

Did they not realize that the app is free?

from The Kansas City Star

Why are people so terrified of hoodies?

from Orlando Sentinel

Here. And here. And over here. And all over the Internet, basically. Did you even try looking?

from San Jose Mercury News

“Thank you for visiting San Jose Mercury News. We are sorry the article that you requested is no longer available.”

Dammit. This headline was so horrible they pulled the entire article before I could even make fun of it.

from Wired.com

2002 asks: “Who or what is Facebook?”

2012 asks: “Who or what is Yahoo?”

from CBS News

Netanyahu to Obama: “What is this expression? You are saying you are holding onto our spine? I do not understand.”